


Memory

by NightOfTheLand



Series: Memory [1]
Category: Captain America - All Media Types
Genre: F/M, I can't write anything happy, Idk this is weird, Memory Loss, Mentions of Sex, mentions of oral sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-12
Updated: 2015-12-12
Packaged: 2018-05-06 09:39:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 801
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5411963
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NightOfTheLand/pseuds/NightOfTheLand
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The Widow made him think, made his mind wonder who she was, made his body betray him in a way it hadn’t before. She was beautiful and deadly and hard and she confused him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Memory

**Author's Note:**

> Unbeta'd so all mistakes are mine. If you see any glaring mistakes please let me know. Enjoy, my darlings!

Nothing was real. Nothing around him was real. The world swam around him in a blur of color and pain. He was floating, suspended in space watching from afar as his body was taken apart and put back together, as the last little bit of his flesh was sewn shut, and the doctors nodded grimly to themselves as if they had done a good job in leaving his flesh scattered with jagged scars. His body was a map of zig zaged roads of raised puckered scars, angry from infection that the doctors care little about, knowing the soldat would heal, the bastardized super soldier serum flowing through his veins would burn off the infection soon enough. The knock off wasn’t impressive enough to keep him from scaring, unlike Steve. - _who is Steve who is Steve is Steve important why why why who who who_ -

Everything was hyper focused has the Handler gave him assignment, pain something his mind no longer registered. It was methodical, the mission preps, the maintenance of his arm, the cleaning of his weapons after the Handler left. Something he didn’t have to think about, something that was easy, like breath should have been. But the weight of the arm pulled and made it hard sometimes to breath. It no longer registered as something of a hindrance.

The soldat worked alone. Until he no longer did, not on this assignment. The girl was tiny, hair red as fire against her pale skin. - _red as a dress in a dingy bar red as lips red as Steve’s ears when he was embarrassed who who who is Steve is Steve important who who who_ \- She was impressive, she could match him in cunning, just barely. But she was young and she would grow into it. She had a name, but it wasn’t for him to know, much like his own - _“Name’s James Buchanan Barnes, but everyone calls me Bucky.” “Why?” “Cause it’s short for Buchanan.” “Oh, I’m Steve. Steve Rogers…”_ -

Black Widow she was called instead of a name. And it suited her, he thought when he allowed himself a moment to have thoughts to himself, which wasn’t often, it was dangerous. He as a weapon and weapons don’t think. The Widow made him think, made his mind wonder who she was, made his body betray him in a way it hadn’t before. She was beautiful and deadly and hard and she confused him.

She was also soft and warm, skin smooth against his hands, and emotions he did not know flared in his mind. This was something he had not been allowed to feel, not been able to feel, buried under pain and airtight control. She was soft inside and out. Her hands gentle, the first gentle touch he could remember, as she touched his bare skin, his chest, his cock before replacing her gentle hands with a gentle mouth. He was confused with the overwhelming emotions that flooded his system as she settled herself on his lap, her lips warm against his, something primal taking over, the animal instinct telling him what to do. - _the body was warm against him his large hand rough as it stroked him teeth buried in his shoulder to keep quiet the sense of danger adding to the pleasure the tightening in his stomach before he muttered against golden warm skin as he came “Steve” who who who is Steve is Steve important Steve is important who who who-_

They were displeased with him when he gave Mission Report. He knew there was going to be more pain and he knew they were going to take her from him. He fought and he fought and he killed them but more came and he was just one man. The chair was hard, the cuffs dug into his skin as he still fought before pain exploded in his head and he screamed and screamed. - _Steve is important pleasure tightening in his stomach hand rough as it stroked him “I’m Steve. Steve Rogers” red as the Widow’s hair red as Steve’s ears when he was embarrassed Steve who is Steve who who who is he important is who important-_

He was struck by a young girl, a Black Widow they told him, her hair red and eyes firey. He watched her as she trained, assessing what needed to be improved, cold impassive. This girl was good, she impressed him. When she looked at him she gave him a tiny smile, one that was tinged with sadness and he felt confusion at the smile. A thought came to him and he tried to push it away, he was a weapon and weapons don’t think, but this thought was insistent. He stared at her as he thought her skin was very soft and warm and her mouth gentle.

**Author's Note:**

> I'm sorry.


End file.
